When No means Go!
Sometimes I need to reflect and today is one of those times. Talking with a friend today, we discussed how people use their titles to create the illusion that they are more important than you. But, what is even more interesting is the people around them seem to think so as well.
I remember an instance when I was searching for my birth parents that led me to a Lawyer's office. When I asked to speak with him, you would have thought three more heads popped out of my neck.
"You do know he is an important man?"
Ok? SO? I thought to myself, and I stared back hard, letting the secretary know I still wanted to speak to him.
What does that even mean?
What makes him so important that we can't have a conversation? What makes a title give someone the ego to think they are above the rest of us. Furthermore, if I had walked out, I may have missed out on the information I needed for the things that are actually important to me, which is not his title.
Don't get me wrong; I respect that people put in the work for their titles: Dr., Lawyers, Politicians, whatever. But, they still use the bathroom like the rest of us. Moreover, the secretary could have just said he was busy and penciled me in.
Talking with my friend moved my mind to what I am always discussing when I speak about building your image and creating what you want the world to perceive you as. Whatever that is, don't be scared to do it, but don't let it go to your head. Stay humble because your ego can drag that image through the mud if you let it.
"The biggest challenge after success is shutting up about it." ~ Criss Jami
Why am I talking about this? Well, when I experienced this, it didn't make me walk away and say, “Of course he is important. Why would he want to talk with me about what is important to me?”
No, I said, "Well, sign me up! I want to talk to someone important apparently."
She said no, I heard Go!
The secretary's commentary made me want to talk to him more. It made me want to find and bedazzle a burger king crown and write 'Queen' on it, come back and respond, "The Queen requests to speak to the lower level lawyer, please," because that is exactly how cheap and ridiculous they sound when they present their title this way.
"On the highest throne in the world, we still sit only on our own bottom." ~ Michel de Montaigne
I try to avoid being around these types of people who live in a world controlled by glass doors with nice writing on them that somewhere in their schooling learned these small decorations give them the right to make others feel less than.
Sometimes we do need a title to work for us though, that's why they went to school. Nonetheless, I like to remind them they went to school to offer a service, not their ego.
Hearing an unnecessary 'No' makes me want to push even harder, right through the title on those glass doors, shattering egos and getting the respect I deserve as a human.
In short, don't let this invalid attitude devalue your drive to access your success. It's just a show. Push back and remind them they are just like us on the inside, guts and all. Show them that you are royalty, and demand to speak to the person behind the title. Don't let other people's success scare you into not getting the information you feel you need for yours. Let 'No' mean 'Go' without all the Ego.